Showing posts with label yoga zone. Show all posts
Showing posts with label yoga zone. Show all posts

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

The Day We Eat Like We Haven't Eaten For A Month, At All!

Duhai Diari,

Niat di hati nak update dan muat turun upload (eh, kalau download = muat turun, upload = ?)
gambar F1 di Singapura, tapi cik abang Supertall saya tak jumpa-jumpa kabel (?) Nikon D200nya.

Maka saya pun layan lah tag raya ini walaupun saya tidak ditag sesiapa.
Bak kata Fara Fauzana yang saudara-mara saya kata muka macam saya,
(mana ada! Saya rasa, saya lebih comel. Perasan gila, kan? Takpe, blog saya)
"Layannnnn.."


Berapa pasang baju raya anda tahun ini dan kaler apakah?
Tahun ni, takde (duit nak beli) baju raya. Biasanya tahun saya jadi pengapit pengantin, memang tak buat baju raya. Sebab kedua utama, saya masih seorang starving yoga instructor, maka duit setengah ribu yang biasa buat baju raya, pada saya lagi berbaloi buat duit raya untuk adik-adik dan anak-anak sepupu.

Tapi setiap tahun, famili saya memang akan bergambar raya sekeluarga di kedai gambar di kampung. Kami semua pakai baju warna turqoise. Sebab saya takde duit nak beli baju raya dan baju kebaya kaler turqoiose saya sudah masuk gambar famili raya beberapa tahun yang lepas, maka saya pinjam dan pakai baju emak saya. nasib baik kami dan dua orang adik perempuan lain sama saiz. Saya sangat tabik dengan emak saya, anak TUJUH tapi badan kalah saya yang si yoga instructor ini.


Apakah makanan raya tradisional kegemaran anda?
Disebabkan bapa saya orang Bugis tulen (atuk saya iaitu bapak kepada bapak saya, lagi banyak cakap bahasa Bugis dari cakap bahasa Melayu) dan saya cucu sulung belah bapa, saya memang lebih berat ke belah Bugis walaupun emak saya tulen Jawa. Hari raya pertama setiap tahun memang dua kereta kami beraya di perkampungan Bugis bapa saya di Pontian, Johor. Siap ada satu-satunya Muzium Bugis di Malaysia di kampung bapak saya tau, jangan main-main!















Sorry lah, gambar macam tak relevan dengan raya langsung!
Tapi diambil di Singapura, tiga malam sebelum raya, aci lah kan?
Di Stesen MRT Bugis yang mahal tu!




Makanya, juadah tradisional kami orang Bugis adalah burasak, bukan ketupat. Burasak, untuk mereka yang belum pernah makan adalah beras yang direndam dalam daun yang saya tak ingat nama dia. Tapi bila dah siap direbus selama 36 8 hingga 12 jam (terima kasih kepada Kay), warna beras tu jadi hijau pandan di luar tapi putih dan lagi lembut dari ketupat dan rupa dia ada macam lepat pisang.

Kesimpulannya, PPSYH (Pada Pendapat Saya Yang Hina)
burasak jauh lebih sedap daripada ketupat mahupun lepat pisang
yang memang kegemaran saya.

Burasak TIDAK dimakan dengan rendang atau ayam masak merah atau lodeh. Burasak afdal dan bertambah keenakkannya bila dimakan dengan sambal ikan parang dan serunding kelapa. Jangan cuba meminta lodeh atau sambal kacang di rumah orang Bugis, nanti kena pancung! Tapi kalau beraya atau ke rumah terbuka rumah (ibu bapa) saya, jangan risau. Disebabkan bapak saya Bugis, emak saya Jawa dan saya perasan Hispanic (hu huu..), maka rumah terbuka kami ADA KESEMUANYA! Selain ketupat, burasak dan segala lawannya, emak saya yang memang pakar memasak juga memang hebat memasak soto, laksa Johor dan signature minestrone spaghettinya.

Kawan-kawan dan saudara-mara yang ada nombornya di telefon saya,
tunggu-tunggulah SMS jemputan majlis perkahwinan rumah terbuka kami tahun ini, ya?

Lupa pulak nak cerita, memandangkan tahun ini tahun pertama saya beraya sebagai seorang vegetarian, maka kalau bertandang ke rumah sanak saudara, saya cuma akan menjamah ketupat atau burasak kosong, paling-paling pun dengan sedikit kuah lodeh atau sambal kacang. Kalau nampak ada serunding, terpaksa bertanya dulu, "Mak Nah, ni serunding daging ke kelapa?". Sedikit pun tak menyesal atau mengidam makan ayam masak merah atau daging rendang, cuma kadang-kadang sedikit trerkesal sebab selalunya tak kenyang. Maka, memang saya standby sesisir pisang (penjodoh bilangan tepat, tak tahan! Masih terkesan jadik cikgu tuisyen BM masa adik UPSR bulan lepas) dalam kereta. Nasib baik bawak kereta sendiri balik beraya tahun ni.


Apakah biskut raya kegemaran anda?
Maaflah, saya memang tak pernah suka apa jenis kuih raya pun :(
kalau kena paksa sekali, seratus kali pun memang saya tak akan makan.


Berapa banyak duit raya anda dapat dan dibelanja untuk bagi kepada budak-budak?
Konfemmmmm saya tak dapat duit raya singget pun,
sebab sedara mara ingat saya kaya dan dah berjaya.
Diorang tak tahu Yoga Zone (cuba klik) dah bankrup
dan masih hutang gaji saya hampir dua puluh ribuuuuuuuuuu.

Eh, tapi Supertall yang super mulia hati sebenarnya bagi saya duit raya,
berapa jumlahnya tak payahlah saya kongsi kat sini.
Nanti semua orang nak jadi awek Supertall raya tahun depan.

Dengan duit raya yang Supertall bagi,
dapatlah saya buat duit minyak dan tol balik kampung (tsk tsk, sedih lagi tak kelakar kan?)
dan bakinya buat duit raya untuk adik-adik saya:
Yang berumur 13 tahun ke atas, dapat sekeping RM100 seorang.
Yang 12 tahun di bawah, dapat sekeping RM50 seorang
(adik Supertall termasuk sekali, chehh.. perasan macam dah jadi adik tu, hu huu..),
tapi masalahnya, saya ada ENAM orang adik, OK!

Anak-anak sepupu yang sempat saya jumpa dan salam tangan, dapatlah RM10 seorang.

Tapi boleh haru jugak tu, FIRST COUSINS saya belah mak campur bapak lebih 150 orang tau! Nasib baik saya buat syarat, ANAK SEPUPU saja yang dapat. Tu pun kalau nak kira, berpuluh jugak anak saudara sepupu saya. Tapi takpe, alhamdulillah semua sangat comel dan sihat belaka.


Apakah aktiviti malam raya korang?
What do you mean, 'korang'?
Ada nampak kita orang buat apa-apa kat mana-mana ke?
Cheh, terasa pedas sendiri. He hee..

Malam raya, sebelum Supertall dan saya memandu ke kampung ibu bapa masing-masing,
(tak paham aku, ada jugak yang busuk hati gila kata aku anak durhaka masa aku kata aku lagi excited nak pergi F1 Singapore dari balik kampung mak bapak aku. KAMPUNG mak bapak aku kat Johor, RUMAH mak bapak aku kat Bangsar. Aku balik RUMAH MAK BAPAK AKU tiga empat kali seminggu, woi! Jangan main syak wasangka ingat aku lupa kampung halaman. Kat Johor tu pun, atuk nenek belah mak aku dua-dua dah meninggal, memang takde sedara-mara berkumpul satu rumah pagi raya lagi dah..)
Supertall sibuk membantu saya unpack barang-barang dan kotak-kotak dari rumah lama saya di Bukit Bandaraya ke apartment baru di Damansara Perdana. Lepas Supertall bayar zakat fitrah di Masjid Saidina Abu Bakar, Bangsar betul-tul belakang RUMAH MAK BAPAK SAYA, kami pun memandu balik ke KAMPUNG MAK BAPAK masing-masing, saya ke Pontian, Supertall ke Kuantan.


Siapa nak ditag?
Siapa-siapa yang takde idea dan masih dalam mood raya.

Bye, saya nak pergi main futsal
dengan kawan-kawan STF
setelah dua bulan tak main ni!

Thursday, August 28, 2008

The Hiatus

Dear Diary,














I'm sorry for the long silence.

I was in mourn for
- the fallout of the biggest yoga empire in Malaysia
- the fact that I am not going to ever get the 3 months outstanding salary I am being owed to
and
- the passing of my Partner Yoga partner (Azmi Samdjaga)'s mother, Allahyarhamah Masmun binti Eju. God bless and rest her soul.

But I am back.
And I'll be back for more in a couple of minutes.

And this time,
I am unstoppable.

Sunday, August 10, 2008

The Day The End Is The Beginning Is The End

Dear Diary,

I always finish off my yoga class with these lines,

"Let's leave our eyes closed for another minute. With the eyes closed, expand our vision and try to see beyond what the eyes always see in the mirror. Learn to always love our body and respect others beyond what our eyes only see.

Exhale to flush away any uncleared pain from the body and toxic feeling in the heart we don't want to bring home and also bad habits and negative attitudes we don't wish to continue doing.

Let this thought be in our heart for today; In order to change the world, we have to change ourselves first. In order to learn to accept other people's flaws, we have to accept ours first. If not us, then who? IF NOT TODAY, THEN WHEN? We are the ones, we have been waiting for."

But that grey Friday morning last week,
after I finished my hot class,
I had to finish off with an additional line, if not a few,

"If I may share another quote today; Sometimes we have to let go of the things we love, in order to love. With heavy heart and with infinite sadness, I have to announce, this is our very last class together, this month. I have tried, with everything if not with what little I have left; to hold on and endure this, for as long as I could. But I can not anymore.

If you don't see me here again in September, I am sure we will still meet. Hopefully someplace better, very soon if not that much later. Namaste.

You may open our eyes now."

As I opened my teary eyes,
I saw some faces with some tears running down their cheeks as well.

THIS, can not have our tears anymore.




















Oh yes.

"I love green but
(I'm sorry for)
I love yoga MORE."


Wednesday, August 06, 2008

The Day I'm "Just Waiting Till The Shine Wears Off.."

Dear Diary,




















Betraying the yoga empire that has upgraded my life,
being rude the man who has given me a magazine to run,
letting my devoted students hanging in this time of trial,
leaving, DEVALUING myself and settling for other jobs that pay only 25% of what I usually make monthly,
are not my kind of options. For now..

To date, I have taught 6 classes at the zone this week,
despite my last full-paid salary was in April.

Some of you who read Page N26 The Star today,
might cringe and ask, "I thought you were paid for May, no?"
Take it from me, honey.
NO.

Last Saturday, I was handed RM300 from XX personally and be told, "Just so that you can have a good weekend," which I translated to, "Just so that you can keep your mouth shut and teach for us come Monday."

If you asked me,
being paid RM300 from RM1X,XXX that you are owed,
is an insult.

I will expect some jokers to leave comments such, "Orang bagi RM300 pendahuluan pun tak nak? Tak tau bersyukur betul anak Ahmad ni." Don't worry, you are not me. And you are not the God I thank / pray to and you are not the employer that owes me, so it's OK and I forgive you. Sweating the small stuff now doesn't save my car from getting towed.

Albeit, it sure did feel good teaching again that Monday,
it was heartfelt learning that your students left you an envelope-ful of money and baskets of fruits after the class ended,
and it was embarrassing having to have shed that tears after my first class this week, for I have to eat my own words, "Simply be happy that our body still moves, be grateful that the air and silence we are breathing are still free.."

Thanks to this highly participated blog,
I found myself listed as one of the surviving ' Last 16 ' that still teach without pay,
BUT I DON'T FIND THIS FUNNY ANYMORE
and I don't know how long more can I go on;
keeping a straight face when I am still being lied to,
smiling as I make you do painful twists when I am deeply hurt too,

I don't think it is for long now,
and my patience and 'believe' are wearing thin.




















I am living off this song to feed my spirit now,

Lost! COLDPLAY,
Vida La Vida (2008)


"Just because I'm losing,
Doesn't mean I'm lost,
Doesn't mean I'll stop,
Doesn't mean I will cross.

Just because I'm hurting,
Doesn't mean I'm hurt,
Doesn't mean I didn't get what I deserve,
No better and no worse,

I just got lost,
Every river that I've tried to cross,
And every door I ever tried was locked,
Ooh-Oh,
And I'm just waiting till the shine wears off..

You might be a big fish,
In a little pond,
Doesn't mean you've won,
'Cause along may come,
A bigger one,
And you'll be lost.

Every river that you tried to cross,
Every gun you ever held went off,
Ooh-Oh, And I'm just waiting till the firing starts,
Ooh-Oh, And I'm just waiting till the shine wears off.."

(Lost! accoustic version)

Monday, August 04, 2008

The Day That Helps, Thank You

Dearest All,




















I will still teach

TODAY (Monday, Aug 4th),
6.30pm
(SlimHot)
7.45pm
(Gentle Flow) at YogaZone, Plaza Damas;
and
TOMORROW (Tuesday, Aug 5th),
7.00am (SlimHot)
8.30am (Gentle Flow) at YogaZone, Plaza Damas;
6.30pm (SlimHot)
7.45pm (Gentle Flow) at YogaZone, The Weld

I am still not paid but but I decide to go on and teach FOR ONE MORE DAY without salary,
for the love of my students (truth is, I miss torturing all of you!) and for my love of yoga.

If you miss practicing yoga or even if you have missed me too ;), see you there.

I am not exactly sure how it works with the RM99 GreenYoga campaign
but, if you can and if you still believe in us, do support it.
Because your RM99 and membership renewal; feed me.

Since I posted the last entry, I feel better.
Pity (and donation!) are the last thing that I expected from that entry,
I just needed to channel out my frustration and answer to what you have heard or read,
personally.

Nevertheless, I am deeply touched and moved by your kindness and concern.














If I can mention names,

To everyone who did leave comments (I read each and every one of them) here,
to lovely Dina Zaman, Amani Athirah, Janice Tan who constantly send moral support over at Facebook
and a special mention to Ain who actually banked in MONEY to my (nevertheless, inactive) account,

to my dearest friends;
Juliana Ibrahim
, Asma & Imran, Rodi, Atilia, Ida Nerina, Jehan Miskin, Megat Imran, Mira, Khai, Ba'dina, Ita, Nellie, Kak Leila & Jessica Lim from adidas, Michelle from Soul'ed Out, 7ate9 and WIP,
who called and texted to check if I'm hanging in there
(some of them even offered me to name my price in teaching them private yoga class!
Don't tempt me, in my unstable state of mind and cash flow, I might just charge RM1000 an hour, he hee..),

to my fellow struggling yoga teachers;
Azmi Samdjaga
, Alex 'The Joker' Atherton, Gary Mow, Matthew, Angie, Lila, Jason and many more;
whom some of them have been evicted from their apartments,

to my sisters;
Dona and Hanim, their husbands, Faizal and Andri and my yoga goddaughter, Rania;
whose screaming over horror movie fest at my house and laughing over my over-salted fried kuey teow for lunch did help ease my pain yesterday,

to my dearest housemates;
Anna-Rina
, Henry Golding and Jamie Archer;
who have been paying for my breakfasts and cheering me up with their recent (or lack-of, in Anna's case) sexual escapades;

to my dad who has never (or not yet?) asked for his money back,
my mom who learned my ordeal from NST and The Star she read on Friday
and texted me a piece of advice, "We are here for you. Come home anytime. And please stay away from Ah Long." Ha haa! Comelnya mak aku (kena puji, she might read this :P)..

to my Supertall / Saviour / Angel;
who has been taking me out for lunch and dinner for almost every day for the past six weeks (although the RM400-for-two dinner at Fisherman's Cove and the RM28 for a quail egg appetizer at The Loaf were totally unnecessary, Sayang), who has been persistently asking for me to "Takpe, you keep the change, Sayang.." everytime he pays for anything with big notes (I think he intentionally does that just so that I'd have spare notes), whom with his salary I paid my Celcom, Astro, Streamyx and petrol for the past two months, who is used to my sudden breakdown and tearing up in front of my food,

And my thanks also go to these Unsigned,















for a piece of laughter to be shared here this bleak Monday afternoon.

And just FYI,
my mom has started reading this blog after a little big bird refreshed my mom on my url.
(although she complains that my blog's small font makes it hard for her to read this.
Ahaaa, that's my whole point ;)! He hee, you know I love you, Ma..)


Thank you and God bless you all.

Saturday, August 02, 2008

The Day You Might Wonder Are You Still / Why Am I Still In The Zone

Dear Diary,

I guess the cat's out of the bag.




















I kept and held it inside for as long as I could:
to not let it affect me emotionally,
to not share it out in my public Diary,
to not get pitied, and
to not let it change how beautiful I always see life is
and to let it change me as a person.

But
- when your life saving is zeroed,
- when your credit card(s) reached its' limit,
- when your utility bills are mounting,
- when you can't even ask for personal loans from banks because apparently your supposedly-deducted-EPF-monthly and annual tax deduction have never even been debited,
- when you had to ask for advance rent from your housemates just so that you can feed your car, drive to teach and pay for parking,
- when you can't afford to continue paying your house rent, car's monthly installment, life insurance, phone bill AND when you had to swallow your pride to ask for a handsome loan you never know when you can ever pay back; from the upset father you hardly communicate with and has never really approved of your chosen career,
- when you had to depend on your boyfriend to buy you dinner every night for the past six weeks,
- when you can't afford to go to your weekly futsal trainings because you have to carefully choose; fork out RM10 for your court's share and you won't have lunch tomorrow,
- when you still continued teaching 10 grueling yoga classes within Monday and Tuesday despite your body was only fed with soy milk and bananas for those two days, not to mention the weekend earlier,
- when your resources and spirit are dampened to the core;

because your last full-paid salary was for the month of April,

I know,
I have changed.
And I don't fancy this change.














I am no longer the Ninie Ahmad my friends love having over overpriced breakfast and coffee,
I am no more the laughing machine and drama queen I used to be,
I am no longer the love-shrink / money-lender my close friends used to turn to;

but I know for sure,
I am still the yoga teacher I inspired to be.

For the past few months,
I still wake up 6 in the morning on Mondays, Tuesdays and Saturdays just so that I can attend to my beloved students at The Weld, Plaza Damas and Taman Desa because they wake up at 6 am too just so that they can have one hour of practice and self-centering very early in the morning before they head to office,

For the past few weeks,
I still battle evening traffic to drive to town to teach because my passionate practitioners might have had a long day at work and my yoga class might be their only channel to de-stress and cleanse themselves before coming back to their family that need dinner and homes that need cleaning from them.
____________________________________________________________________________

If you wondered,

Why do I still teach there,
what am I still waiting for,
why do I still hope;
despite not being paid for more than 3 months?

Because I know some of us are going through it worse that I am,
some of the cleaners have been starving for days because they don't have their family around to provide them with sympathy meals,
some of the foreign teachers have been kicked out their apartments because the rent and lease have not been paid for more than three months now,
some of front desk & consultants have been sleeping in darkness because their electricity has been cut;

Because this, humbles me.

Because cursing and blaming it to only one person doesn't solve it and won't pay my rent,
and my lunch for that matter.

Because I still want to believe in miracles.
Because I still want to believe that things will happen our way if we believe enough.
Because I know God will somehow work His way to ease our ordeal across our students' prayers in our honesty and hardwork in teaching.

Because I still want to believe in 'believe' and that,
there is still a tomorrow. Or a better August for some, if not for all of us.

AMIN.

____________________________________________________________________________

To end this on a lighter note,
if I can still smile or make you smile with me
(or even over my 6-forehead and 1000-pimples):










since our zone has been making front page and prime time headlines since Friday,
I have been receiving many condolence calls and SMSes from friends and students asking me if they can buy me breakfasts, lunches and dinners.

Yes, you can :)
Foot and shoulder massages are accepted too.


Wednesday, July 30, 2008

The Day Malaysia Boleh (tahan lah!)

Dear Diary,

I haven't felt this proud being a Malaysian for quite some time.
(Although my 'quite some time' was only last Saturday when Nicol David won Malaysian Open again,
and she wore the very same adidas Techfit top I was wearing that day as well ;D)




















0-2 to Chelsea, not bad!

Thank God I had The Joker (Yoga Zone's new yoga teacher, Alex from Canada is one funny guy, I tell you) and Kak Leila from adidas in my Batmobile or else I would have died in the two-hour traffic going to the stadium and another to get out of it after the match.

There is still no Internet in my room (my tech support is finally coming home from London this Friday!) and I still can't find my Sony T-11's USB adapter (while I'm at it, anybody has extra?), or else I could have shared up close pictures of Ashley Cole, Michael Ballack and heh heh, Anuar Zain whom according to adidas' Brand Manager, was seated in the VVIP box.

_____________________________________________

A special message to my dearest practitioners at Yoga Zone,

Do not stop practicing, yoga is 99% practice, 1% theory,
practice on your own this week, if you can.
And if we don't ever get to practice together again,
I wish you well and all the very Zen.

Although I want to believe that, we will.
Until Monday..

_____________________________________________